In my adventures through the internet, I copy and paste things that I find interesting into notepad files.
Dumping some here because I can.

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spam folder, I don’t know who gave you the idea that I want a ton of viagra and want to enlarge my penis

thread- describe games:

A game where a psychic beetle from the future crashes a meteorite in your backyard to tell you, a steak-loving baseball player, that a prophecy has pitted you against an entity resembling an ambient rape scene. You proceed to chase Eric Cartman around the world, with help from your companions (a psychic preschool teacher, a socially retarded mechanic, and a shy karate prince). At the end of your chase you must use time-traveling robots to abort a cosmic fetus.

A game where an army of giant pig cosplayers takes over your island, and you start seeing robot dinosaurs running around. After Cartman brainwashes your twin brother, you become psychic from sucking off a transvestite in a hot spring. Assisted by a smack-talking princess and a handicapped thief, you travel around your island racing your evil twin in a contest to perform acupuncture on a giant dragon. Your dead mom helps you and your dog stop your him from destroying the world.

- Cock juggling thunder faggot

A well timed “you stupid motherfucker” is surprisingly hilarious.

“C’mon bro, you’re shitting on my tits.”
A guy said this.

I get a lot of hatemail on PSN over Mortal Kombat 2. After streaking someone 22 times I get a mail that say something like, “all u use is raiden, go teleport onto your fathers dick.” i lol’d

FUCKING CRASH YOUR YOGURT TRUCK INTO MY TUNA DUNGEON

-Douche Canoe

-what the bitch!
-son of a dick!
-HOLY COCK!

And lives by a credo:

- Just be awesome

- Don’t think

- If you think something is awesome, be that, and stop thinking about it.

- fear no villain

- DaMaGe nothing

in this book george orwell goes back in time to 1984 and fights the government

Do not think that how much you weigh has anything at all to do with being fat.

If you weight 300 pounds but are at 8% bodyfat, are you fat? Hell no.

Try this:

Get PT gear. Running shoes. Light shirt. Running shorts.

Put them beside your bed.\

Set your alarm to wake you up an hour early.

Now, when that fucker wakes you up. Sit up and put on your PT gear. Walk out the door. Walk down the street a block or two to warm up a little. Do a little light stretching.

Now, break into a jog. Jog for 30 minutes. It’s always best to push yourself. You’ll want to be sweating profusely by the end of this.

I guarantee you will feel like a million bucks for the rest of the day

You never look stupid trying to get in shape.

I’m tired of sandbox games, I don’t want or need developers promising me that in their game I can do everything. No, what I want is a simple platformer with great physics, nice gameplay mechanics and a proper, well thought-out story with a great ending. I don’t need a game that I could play until the apocalypse, I just want to be entertained for about 12 hours. Multiplayer and co-op are welcome but not necessary. Anyone with me?

[Monster Hunter] its alot like how GodHand received a bad review

the game is very simple in its mechanic, but it is brutal in its execution

its for those who love the thrill of a good fight and don’t mind biting off more than they can chew

Aww, has somebody got a case of the grumpies? Is somebody a mean ol’ grumpy bear? Does the mean ol’ grumpy bear need hugs? Poor little guy. He needs hugs.

The Last Sheikah, on OneClickWifi: “Also, everyone on the site is a bit gay.”

“The thing which is unnatural about nudity is that we are often not nude enough.”
– Mitchel P. Kennedy, circa 2009

I need to study more anatomy. Luckily, I’ve already been carefully observing the ladies around town!

What’s unfucking believable is that there are people like you. People had to come up with clever ways to get you to keep pressing buttons on the old consoles because the technology was so limiting at the time.
We’re reaching the point where people aren’t looking for the next great mechanical innovation in control and gameplay. They start looking for deeper meaning between their interactions with the game.

It’s like having an argument about the depth of silent films to something like 12 Angry Men. The technology in film advanced sufficiently enough that dialogue didn’t have to be thought of as a limiter on how much action can be shown on screen.

There are GOOD silent films and there are BAD non-silent films but to say silent films were better because of the limitations of the medium is fucking stupid. In general, non-silent films are better because they tell deeper stories, and connect with its audience better.

The videogame medium is evolving whether you like it or not. One day there’s going to be a game that has deep cultural and philosophical ramifications not because of waggle-technology but because the nature of the interactivity between the system and the story it’s telling and the user is genuinely thought provoking.

Then all of a sudden we’ll get people who will say
“Remember when people played videogames for the new control scheme? What a bunch of faggots.”

Hard work is a talent.

The keys to becoming a good artist are low self esteem and stubborn determination.

Ever since I was 12 years old, I’ve been ashamed of everything I’ve ever drawn. I have never been happy with a single thing that I’ve ever created, and because of this, I’m constantly searching for ways to improve. I can tell that I’ve become better on a technical level, but I will never be happy with it, and this is a good thing.

Happiness leads contentment, and contentment leads to stagnation.

You: Helloo
Stranger: I am a man..21.! Real horny right now..Thus , in search of a pinnk tight pussy..and twin pairs of admirable boobies..! Have You got ‘em…and are u GAME enough babay..? :))
You: I’m sonic..SONIC the hedgehog!
You: I’ve been in many games man
You: Are you looking for Amy?
Stranger: no
Stranger: looking fr a slut
You: Amy is a slut
Stranger: prove that u bitch
Stranger: suck me dry
You: But I’m Sonic!
You: Sonic doesn’t do the DEWD
Stranger: wtf
You: Are you eggman?
You: Hmmph your dirty tricks wont work on me THIS time eggman!
Stranger: haha
Stranger: no
You: I’ll make you eat those words!
Stranger: huh
You: I wont let you get away with this robotnick
Stranger: hgaah
You: I’m the fastest thing alive!
Stranger: hahah
You: Watch my faster then the speed of sound disconnecting
You have disconnected.

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